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How To Remember Names
This may sound like a crazy article for a psychiatrist to be writing, but I’m constantly surprised by how many people tell me they’re horrible at remembering names and wish they could be better, but often they don’t know where to start. The ability to correctly recall someone’s name is a tremendous advantage in business as well as spurring other people to remember you. Dale Carnegie reminds us in his book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” that there is no sweeter sound to a person than hearing their own name.
Most of us would like to be masters of name remembering, but the bad news is that it usually doesn’t come natural and it takes work. The good news is that you can improve. Here are some strategies that you can start practicing today that will help you. Once you get the hang of this you’ll be amazed when you see people’s faces light up in response to hearing you say their name.
The first thing to do is to listen well. This may sound oversimplified, but we often are so busy thinking about what we are going to say or ask, that we don’t really pay attention when we are introduced to people. Repeat the name in your mind as soon as you hear someone’s name. This signals your unconscious mind that it's something to be remembered.
If the spelling is not evident, ask about it: "How is that spelled?" Repeat the spelling aloud or in your mind. Then make an association to help you remember the name. For example, if his name is Bill Braun, and he is large, you might think "Billy Brawny," while imagining his muscles all puffed up. If it is Mary Franks, and you already know her husband, you might think "She Married Franks." For a gray headed man named Jay, you might say “Gray Jay” to yourself several times.
Obviously you'll want to keep these images and labels to yourself. They are simply meant to aid you in remembering. If you've ever seen a memory expert memorize the names of dozens of strangers in a room, these are the kinds of methods likely used. They link body features or personality traits to a person's name in some humorous or unusual way. Again, it does take practice to get good at this.
The good thing about practicing this skill is that it is one you will use pretty much every day for the rest of your life. If you want to really get creative you can make name memory into a competitive game. Take your spouse, or a friend, with you to a party and see who can learn the most names.
Check out the Clements Clinic Connection to find more useful strategies to help you better remember names—we also have some memory tips as well—to sharpen your recall.
